Words I Write

Post 9: Get Out of Your Comfort Zone: Singing

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Singing.

Well, I’m not actually going to sing, but I will come up with my very own song about VW.

Chorus:
V-Double-U is great it’s true,
But you already knew that didn’t you?
Because we’ve been around
The block a few hundred times.
And we know how to write
A song that rhymes.

Yeah V-Double-U is great it’s true,
But you already knew that didn’t you?
Not your grandad’s car,
but just as good.
You know you love
What’s under the hood.

V-Double-U is great it’s true,
But you already knew that didn’t you?
We’re always nice,
No smoother ride.
We’re cheap on gas,
And fun to drive.
And we’ve got your back,
All five hundred miles.
No need to walk
The whole way home,
Cause we know she’ll let you
Walk her down any aisles
Just show up with us,
you’re always welcome.

Yeah V-Double-U is great it’s true,
But you already knew that didn’t you?
You already knew that didn’t youuu?

Yeah, well, it’s kinda dumb.
I snuck in a reference to the Proclaimers’ “I would walk 500 miles” too.
Brand relevance: definitely covers enduring value with the whole dependable reputation and long-standing business thing. Innovative design: “not your grandad’s car.” Motoring pleasure: cheesy but present and accounted for.

Post 48: Predict the Future: Pedal Power

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Why is it that everyone assumes the future will be all chrome spires, space elevators, and hovercars? I happen to hope that in the future we’ll care more about the planet than getting from place to place faster. I want pedal power. Imagine what a car commercial would be like if every car was zero emissions. The advertising goals would have to be totally different. It would be about the experience instead of the speed or efficiency, the emotion instead of the motion. Now I’m not talking derpy little Flintstone’s cars here, just because the technology is basic doesn’t mean it can’t be elegantly designed. Picture this: All VW cars are self-propelled in that you yourself propel the car, and to make it actually reasonable, everything uses magnetic repulsion to hover so that you only have to exert energy to move forward, you aren’t fighting friction. An advanced yet basic mechanism converts your mechanical energy into kinetic energy. Cars can look how ever you like them because aerodynamics don’t matter, you don’t need to get anywhere that fast. Your car could be a bubble or a bullet or a pyramid or anything in between, it’s up to you. Infinitely customizable option still make sense because each car is 3D printed on demand, no wasted materials, instant supply and demand. So how would VW advertise in this cleaner, better future? Something fun and silly and totally absurd: bubbles. Nanomolecular particles mixed with soap could make bubbles in any shape imaginable, mimicking existing cars and any other forms and modeling the possibilities for your custom car.

“The future is bright, but we’ll be sure not to leave the lights on.” “The only thing full of hot air is our patented bubble mods.” etc, etc.

This was weird and totally outlandish but whatever. It’s an idea. An alien of an idea but an idea nonetheless. Does it represent the brand? Everyday motoring pleasure? Check. Enduring value? Sure, let’s say these cars last right up until you push the auto-biodegrade button which denatures all the protein structures holding it together and it turns into carbon and other excellent and fully recyclable materials. Innovative design? You bet. Don’t tell me that infinitely customizable cars isn’t innovative.

Post 49: Tell Stories: Paradise Lost

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So I went to the park a while back.
It used to be Geometry Park but now it’s called “Paradise Park” which is strangely suiting when you actually think about it. First off, it’s tucked down an alleyway, nearly impossible to find if you don’t know what you’re looking for, so it sort of is a hidden paradise, a secluded little haven. And then there’s the park itself. It isn’t really a ‘park’ in that there are no trees or playground equipment, nothing really except for some odd geometric shapes with strangely childlike artwork painted on them. Aside from the murals, the shapes look rather like very large building blocks just sort of strewn about and piled together haphazardly.

The most painfully poetic thing about it though is the graffiti which I probably wouldn’t have even noticed really if there hadn’t been parks and rec employees there when I went, talking about how best to go about covering or removing it. When they left, I had a look for myself and sure enough this bizarre hidden and childlike ‘paradise’ had been contaminated by spray painted tags, racial slurs, and crude drawings. It was profoundly saddening that such a strange and beautiful place was ruined without a second thought by careless and/or angry individuals ‘rebelling against the man’.

And really, that’s how most innocent things get ruined, misguided anger and abuse.

This has nothing to do with Volkswagen, Elizabeth. Yeah, I know, I’m getting there. So most people know the basic story of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, right? It was paradise made specifically for them but they disobeyed the one rule and got banished from it forever. Well I was thinking about that, and about paradise park, and perfection in general, how it’s unattainable now, and I was like, “well what’s as close to perfect as you can get?” VW. (Okay, we all know not really, but just go with it.)

So play that up. Have a VW car right outside of a breathtakingly gorgeous fenced-in garden (garden of eden reference) and have this line or something similar: “as close to paradise as you can get.”

That’s it. That’s all I got. And I can’t photoshop to save my life so that’s all you get too.

Post 25: Have Fun: Musical

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I keep going back to traffic so I’m going to do a post about it.

So there’s a back up on the interstate, cars are just crawling along. Everyone is tired, annoyed, or apathetic as they sit in traffic. There’s a fake billboard advertisement with an overly cheerful kid in lederhosen eating ice cream. Eyes roll. Watches tick. Some horns honk sporadically. Suddenly the billboard changes. (And becomes..what? A scoreboard? A karaoke scroller? A game of pinball?)

What kinds of things could even be used to play games in traffic?

  • headlights
  • horns
  • radios
  • car doors

(hmm, how about using all of those to make music?)

So combine that stuff. The watch ticking. A turn signal, the seatbelt chime, car doors slamming, seat belts clicking, headlights flashing, all of them can be part of a song. Okay, so back to the drawing board:

Back up on the interstate, cars are crawling along. Everyone is tired, annoyed, or apathetic as they sit in traffic. Eyes roll. Watches tick. Some horns honk sporadically. One guy in a VW lets out an explosive sigh and jerks forward out of his slump to turn on the radio. He fiddles with it, flipping through a bunch of stations before landing on the first few notes of a song, the perfect song. He starts tapping. On the steering wheel, the dashboard, he messes with his windows, and as he does, the people in cars nearby catch on. His enthusiasm is contagious. So they pick up the beat too. More and more people wake up out of their haze and get into it. Before the song is over there’s a whole host of foot-tapping, light-flashing people in on the impromptu jam session.

“VW. Find your fun. Anywhere.”

Better. Much better.

Post 43: Grow the Brand: Bread Crumbs

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In case you can’t tell, it’s supposed to say, “BREAD CRUMBS”.

Bit of chalk street art here, and while I can definitely say I had fun doing this one, even though it was quite cold outside and I got a number of funny looks in the process, I realize now that I really should have planned it out a little better (or at all) when I started because this is confusing. the concept has a sense of whimsy to it that I like. The trail of ‘breadcrumbs’ begs you to follow it, the only problem with this incarnation is that it doesn’t actually lead anywhere. If this was to be a proper brand experience, I would do one of two things: either tie it into the murals project (Follow the path to find the different murals!) or have the path lead to a VW dealership or something. I personally like the tie-in much better, and I like that I’m sort of continually building upon earlier ad ideas, ‘growing’ the brand by ‘growing’ these into full blown ad campaigns.

Post 44: Big Idea: Train of Thought

creativity

All aboard! Let’s try this two minute activity.

So doing a sort of stream-of-consciousness thinking session, forcing myself to just sit, not write or wander or fidget, actually works wonders. It dug up an old idea I never used and had basically forgotten about. Okay, so we’ve probably all seen at least a few of the advertisements mocking the new iPhone 6 bending, and some of them are pretty great. The incident even prompted a trending hashtag on Twitter, “#bendgate.”

 

 

Everyone was quick to get in on the joke, even companies that had nothing to do with phones. And who could blame them? Ads that take advantage of pop culture are very successful during the time that they’re relevant, and if they can poke fun at the shortcomings of another brand, even better.

Thus my idea: make fun of smart cars and advertise Beetles at the same time. I had this gem during a class activity using figurative language and kind of ran with it.

It’s like a smart car for regular sized people. Smarter than a smart car, because you can still move your legs. Do your part for the planet without feeling like a sardine.
And my personal favorite:
127213_little_tikes_cozy_coupe_

 These could be a whole series of print ads that are snarky, irreverent, and very VW. It also focuses on the value of VW, but the fact that it still provides comfort and motoring pleasure. Now that’s innovative.

Post 46: The Spread of Ideas

creativity

Something I struggle with is sharing my ideas. I equal parts want to take full credit for them and don’t want to show them to anyone and be vulnerable which really ends up getting me nowhere. What right can I claim to ideas that I never put out there? And what’s more, I’ll never improve if I don’t put myself in a position to receive feedback and collaborate. In the same way that running with people who are in better shape than you helps you improve, so working with more artistic or creative people than yourself develops your own creativity.

So then, am I in some way obligated to share my ideas so that others have the opportunity to improve themselves, and even build off of my ideas? What if “intellectual property” is killing collaborative ideas?

That’s where the theory of the “collective brain” comes in. It says we are all neurons and working together will get us places we can’t even dream of but if we doggedly claim innovations and concepts as “belonging” to anyone, we aren’t going to get anywhere. Patent laws are supposed to promote the progress of useful arts but they have become one of the major roadblocks for technological innovation because people are taking credit for things like ‘swiping to unlock’. Come on now, that isn’t promoting anything.

And how does any of this relate to VW?

Well if you remember the post about all ‘new’ ideas being remixes of preexisting material, you’d know that this discussion is sort of irrelevant. I fancy myself original and creative but chances are, everything I come up with has been done at least once before, if not over and over throughout the history of humanity. Maybe I did actually manage to add something new to it, give it a different spin; at least I hope so, but really we only want to think we’re special..

“Original”

A super quirky guy (dyed, edgy hair, tattoos, hip clothes) buys a used car. It has weird bumper stickers on it, a funky colored steering wheel cover, fuzzy dice on the mirror, the list goes on. He hates all of it so he throws out the dice, peels off the stickers, removes the wheel cover, and is satisfied. For a while. But little by little he finds his own personality becoming part of the car. He adds ‘save the earth’ bumper stickers, puts a dreamcatcher on the rearview mirror, and buys all natural fiber seat covers. One day he looks at the car and realizes that he has come full circle and he laughs, then gets in and drives off.
“VW, make it yours.”

Eh. It’s not terrible. It throws enduring value in there, sort of subliminally, there’s definitely some motoring pleasure, and while there isn’t much in regard to playing up innovative design, two out of three’s not bad.

Post 45: Grow the Brand: Let’s Play a Game

fun

I’m a fan of Google.
As a brand, as a company, and as a web browser (Chrome is beautiful, fast and user friendly) Google goes above and beyond, with lots of funny little hidden jokes along the way. On Chrome, for example, when shockwave or flash player crashes, a page saying “He’s dead Jim.” would appear. This is a clever little reference to all the dispensable characters in the TV show “Star Trek”. Likewise, when there are internet connectivity problems, a cute like pixelated T-Rex shows up on your webpage along with your error message; a reference to the Tyrannosaurus in “Meet the Robinsons” whose arms were too short to reach what it wanted. The most recent chrome update has actually made that little guy just a little more fun. The space bar or up arrow key on most computers initiates a game with our short-armed friend, something cute and entertaining for when your internet has issues.

I think what Google does in these instances is really quite powerful. Inserting a little humor into situations that are typically a source of frustration and annoyance really helps build your brand. That got me thinking about a suggestion I had made a while back in a comment, something about a game on a billboard for when you’re stuck in traffic. While it doesn’t have to be on a billboard, VW doing something to make traffic jams, an unpleasant hassle for all drivers, into something fun is a great chance to build the brand through brand experiences. I’ve played around with the idea of a “VW Button” but what would it do? Maybe you push it and it inserts fun into everyday things. Doesn’t something like that exist already though?… I’ll stick with the traffic jam idea.

This idea is NOT realistic but that’s okay, because I’m realistic a little too often. This one is for the ridiculous.

Same premise as post 25, extra boring traffic jam, but this time let’s use the billboard. Let’s do the ‘hidden camera’ style thing and include footage of the set up. The billboard is an LCD screen, or whatever the electronic billboards usually are, and powerful loudspeakers are installed in the area where the billboard is visible. During regular traffic, it flips between ordinary ads. We see rush hour roll around and things come to a four-line virtual stand still. Suddenly we see the billboard flash brightly a few times and a boot-up sound pipes over the loudspeakers. A ten second countdown next to a picture of a chair flashes on the billboard. At zero a buzzer sounds and music starts playing (all fairly well known songs). most people are probably still confused but the first few catch on. Some car doors open and we see a chinese fire drill in progress. The music stops abruptly and those who are playing do a mad dash back into their cars as a picture of a chair flashes on the billboard. More people start to understand. As the music starts again, more car doors open as people join in. the game gets bigger each time and eventually the traffic-jam annoyance is forgotten. When the game ends the billboard flashes “Thank you for playing.” “Fun. Powered by VW.”

Post 50: Tell Stories: Chasing My Muse

creativity

Here’s a bit of four minute thinking (which really ended up being twenty-ish minute thinking). the topic: chasing your muse (as inspired by yet another TED talk).

There’s a guy, young, attractive, but obviously stressed. He’s sitting at an outdoor cafe with a cup of coffee working on something and looks at his watch and makes a worried face. He has a notebook/sketchbook open and he’s obviously struggling with something. He glances up from his work and sees a beautiful woman in an ethereal dress looking at him from down the block. He hurries to gather up his stuff and leave as she is going around the corner. He gets up and goes after her but as he rounds the corner, she throws a smile at him and goes into a museum (ironic, I know). He chases after her and we see quick flip shots akin to the typical “Where are you, Scooby Doo?” chase scene with everyone going in and out of doors in a hallway etc. only in a building full of art. She eventually leaves and he follows her, wandering past lots of people on a crowded sidewalk, following glimpses of her the whole way. Eventually he stops and ends up sitting down to lunch with a friend. We see him explain but can’t hear the words. He gestures indicating his frustration and just how close he’s gotten before the muse eludes him again. The friend nods and listens, then talks for a bit himself. They get into a passionate discussion over their forgotten food and suddenly the camera pans to a previously unoccupied chair at their lunch table, now with the ethereal woman sitting in it smiling. She reaches out and touches his hand and then vanishes. At that moment he has a visible breakthrough. He yanks out his notebook and starts working furiously, thanks his friend, and rushes out. We see him working later that day, bringing his now complete idea to life. (And insert VW plug here?)

I like this idea as an idea, but it doesn’t actually relate to the brand, really. Sure there’s some innovation, and it could be a great thing, but it wouldn’t be a good ad because you wouldn’t know what product it’s selling or what brand it represents. You’d watch it and say “Wow! That’s awesome!” and then forget what brand it’s about. There’s actually an ad (the whole campaign is good, really) by GE about ideas that’s really powerful and also a great ad because you can still remember who the ad is about.